Breaking Through the MT Mould (The Musical Theatre Complex)

Where I come from Musical Theatre is held up on a pedestal. It is the world of the #triplethreat, and if you’re not a great actor at least you have singing and dancing to back you up. At least that is what I thought when I decided to become an actor, and how could I learn otherwise when it was constantly displayed to me in professional settings? In high school everyone coveted being cast in the musicals, but only a select few auditioned for the straight plays. Community theatre musicals would sell out, but rarely did plays have a full audience. Large touring venues only brought in musical tours. The list goes on, so I thought that was what I had to strive for…and man did I STRIVE. I began to only listen to musicals. I started to try to dance. I started taking voice lessons.

When I auditioned for my university's theatre program initially I was put on the waitlist, and when I was finally accepted I was accepted to the Theatre Education program. I was ecstatic to just get into the program until fellow classmates asked what track I was on and when I exclaimed, “Theatre education!”, their response was, “Oh, so you’re not on a performance track.” What did that even mean? I would be taking all the same classes as the MT and Acting track majors plus some classes to get my teaching certificate. We would get the same opportunities and education, but something in their responses made me belittle myself. Was I not good enough for a “performance” track? So, I worked my butt off and decided to re-audition in my second year to get switched to the Musical Theatre track. I had to prove myself for the third time to the professors I was already taking classes from that I was good enough to be considered more than just a theatre teacher. Then FINALLY I was accepted and placed on the Musical Theatre Track. I felt that I was finally worthy… until I started only being cast in straight plays. Once again, I was thinking, ‘am I not good enough of a singer or dancer to get the roles everyone else coveted?’ So once again I worked my butt of to get good enough to be put in the musicals, and I finally did, but in doing so I began to injure my body. I was not a trained dancer and the classes I took on campus were taught by other dancers not trained to notice if I was doing moves incorrectly. Also, being as petite as I am, I was the first chosen to do crazy dance lifts because I was easy to through around. But once again I was being thrown around by other MT majors who also weren’t properly trained so every time I was thrown up in the air I wasn’t supported in landings, and eventually this caused great damage to my feet.